The “mean times” of life often explode on the scene — taking us by surprise; knocking us for a loop; blindsiding us; pulling the rug out from under our feet! Those are the ones that shock, stun, eliminate, decimate, obliterate and destroy in an instant of time! Those are the headline grabbers — the stories that capture the attention and sometimes morbid fascination of the public! They tend to shatter life with unmistakable force!
As devastating as those events are, there are other “mean times” that are more subtle and sinister –perhaps even more evil in nature. They slither into our hearts, minds and spirits and slowly squeeze the life out of us. They obscure hope. They deface healthy self-esteem. They choke optimism. They steal self-respect. They leach away benevolence. They convince of ultimate failure. Instead of just “mean times” through which we pass, they instead become our life — a way of thinking, feeling and believing! It is no wonder that so many people despair in the face of temporary roadblocks that appear insurmountable! Their vision is distorted.
A few years ago, I read a most powerful book by Jack Canfield and Mark Victor Hansen (authors of the Chicken Soup series) entitled The Aladdin Factor! This is an absolutely wonderful book! Without going into great detail, the book essentially addresses the power of asking questions — of self, others, life, God, the Universe! The power of asking . . .
I recall that a life insurance agent friend of mine taught me a lesson about the inherent power of questions when he said, “Statements simply tell. Questions on the other hand, SELL!” Think about that one for a while!
One of Dr. Phil’s favorite questions is, “So, how’s that workin’ for ya?”
In therapy, well phrased, well thought-out questions often hold the key to tremendous personal insight and discovery. Ask . . . and . . . wait. Ask . . . and . . . wait! Allow the power of the question time to do its work.
We often ask questions when the BIG “mean times” hit us — What will we do? Where will we go? How do we solve this? What are our options? Etc. On the other hand, it seems that we rarely ask hard questions of the persistent “mean times” that attach themselves to our lives. It is almost as if we resign ourselves to the inevitability of a life filled with the things that weigh us down.
What are some of those thoughts, beliefs and feelings — false to be sure — that have, like the proverbial wolf in sheep’s clothing, disguised themselves as “truth” and become ensconced in your life? If you are like I am, I battle these sneaky little devils every day! Every time I find myself “stuck,” I can almost guarantee that it is because of some self-defeating thought, belief or feeling. One of the most freeing questions I have learned to ask myself after reading The Aladdin Factor is, “What is it you are pretending to NOT know?” It is a tough question to ask, but very freeing indeed!
I wonder what might happen if . . . we began with just one area of our lives — an area in which we feel stuck — and begin asking that question. “What are you pretending to NOT know?”
I wonder what might happen if . . . husbands asked themselves that question when their marriage seems headed for the toilet? I wonder what might happen if . . . instead of blaming another for my problem, I ask myself that question? I wonder what might happen if . . . I step into the misery of another by asking myself that question? I wonder what might happen if . . . lawmakers asked that question the next time they are tempted to dress up the same old tired answer in new clothes and pass it off as something different? I wonder what might happen if . . . when I face the same scary situation for the tenth time in a row, I ask myself that question? I wonder what might happen if . . . warring parties would pause long enough to ask that question instead of acting on impulse? I wonder what might happen if . . . ?
Do you get my drift? What might happen if you and I started with just one area of life and apply that question? I wonder?
Here’s the challenge — buy the book; read it; work at learning how to ask great questions; start with one area of your own life! Talk back to me and let’s see what might happen!
Peace!
Very soon, the book, Awaken to Good Mourning will be available on all major ebook platforms. Early June 2012 is the anticipated date of availability. In the meantime, please visit http://pagani.temp.domains/~ywlntjqt/Awaken_to_Good_Mourning.html to read more.
