In know! I know! The phrase, "CAN IT" likely conjures up many different pictures in your mind, but don’t go jumping to conclusions! I mean this in a very positive way! In fact, this is the first of two phrases that open the door to explore what I call "Possibility Living!" I remember reading a book quite some time ago (back when dinosaurs were young and I was in high school) entitled The Power of Positive Thinking! Perhaps you read it as well! Over the last 18 or so years, I have worked to find ways to expand the concept of simply "thinking positively" toward a more tangible "living positively" — both in my own life and the lives of others with whom I have been privileged to work! That task is arguably more difficult than it might appear at first glance!
Since this blog addresses the challenges associated with "Living in the Meantimes" — and man are we ever in the midst of some real whoppers right now — one logical idea worth attention is that of finding ways to live more positively in spite of the dark clouds of uncertainty looming over our collective horizons!
I have already referred to The Relationship Grid in previous essays providing some details to what I call The Four Givens in life — Life is a Struggle; Lives Are Shattered; Life Goes On; and Relationships Do Continue! I have shared that we must all acknowledge and accept the reality of these givens in order to find ways to live with purpose when "mean times" strike. I have also touched on the necessity of spending "appropriate amounts of time" in each of those givens — both grieving (experiencing the feelings associated with loss and change) and beginning the process of mourning (employing personal strategies that help us externalize the feelings of grief in order to make meaning from the changes and challenges we face). We have even explored suggestions that might help us know when to move on to the "next thing" ahead of us.
Now comes the time for us to step into the realm of Possibility Living — an arena that promises tremendous opportunity for growth and discovery! This Possibility Living is made up of of two components — components I call the Two Can-Do’s! So if I tell you to "Can It" when you face a "mean time" in your life and need guidance to live in the "meantime" — the time in between the unexpected challenge and the "new normal" that will ultimately follow — you will know that I am not being rude or insensitive. I am simply calling to mind the necessity of exploring the first of the Two Can-Do’s which is, Life CAN Be Good!
Right up front, I want to say that we all need bits of inspiration from time to time to keep us focused on life’s possibilities — to believe that Life CAN Be Good! Without them, we often teeter on the edge of believing that life will always be a downer — especially when we find ourselves in the middle of one! Music is one area I tend to mine for nuggets of inspiration! I don’t know about you, but songs routinely provide the inspiration required to stay focused!
One of my favorites — and apparently a favorite of others as well — is Brooks & Dunn’s Only In America — a song that played prominent roles in the Republican National Convention during the last election and the Democratic National Convention this year. An official statement from Kix Brooks about the use of Only In America after the Democratic National Convention speech from Barack Obama conveyed the universal appeal of such inspirational messages when he said, "Seems ironic that the same song Bush used at the Republican convention last election would be used by Obama and the Democrats now. Very flattering to know our song crossed parties and potentially inspires all Americans." (as quoted from the Brooks & Dunn website)
What is so inspirational about Only In America? Read these words from the song:
Only in America
Dreaming in red, white and blue
Only in America
Where we dream as big as we want to
We all get a chance
Everybody gets to dance
Only in America
Here is a song that screams possibilities! It talks about dreaming — dreaming about life the way we want it to be! It even goes beyond the dreaming part of the puzzle and embraces the opportunities we have to pursue those dreams — we ALL have the chance to hit the floor and do our thing! And it happens to be in a place we live — America! Wow! What powerful words of inspiration! Over the last six years, I have been privileged to hear B & D in concert several times. They have a special edition of Only In America that literally brings the house down — every single time! I get goose bumps just thinking about the experience! If you haven’t had a chance to see a B & D show, you ought to — if for no other reason than to have the Only In America experience! You’ll be glad you did!
Life CAN Be Good! The sign posts are everywhere! In the Bible; in poetry; in Nature; in music; in art; in dance; in books — EVERYWHERE! We routinely must make conscious choices to find and pay attention to those sign posts, however. God knows that the media certainly focuses on the problems we face. Wouldn’t it be nice if one of the major network evening news programs dedicated the entire thirty minute segment to the Possibilities of Life rather than the harsh realities that dog us all the time? Now I am not saying to approach this as an extension of "denial" of the realities! Not at all! What I would like to see is a program that focuses on individuals and groups that face the realities head on and work to create the silver lining around the clouds of uncertainty — living the possibility that Life CAN Be Good!
What kind of life would you like to have? What would that life include? You might say, "Come on Mark! Everyone wants more money! More money would solve everything!" Would it? Would more money be at the top of your list? I know lots of people for whom more money would find its place somewhere near the middle of the list or not on the list at all. For many, security; peace; comfort; love; connectedness; accomplishment; or service to others would rank far above more money!
You see, the beauty of Possibility Living lies in fact that each one of us has the ability to dream in the way we choose! We are not bound by the dictates of others! If we are, then we need to re-think our situation to determine just whose bidding we are doing!
I have mentioned the book, The Path by Laurie Beth Jones before. I encourage you to buy, read and complete the exercises contained in this powerful little volume! You see, Life CAN Be Good and you can create the life you desire if you follow The Path!
Another book that I encourage you to read is The Secret by Rhonda Byrne. My first time through, I was a bit put off because it reminded me a little of the "name it and claim it" theology that has been floating around for years. I had a hard time seeing through my bias. My second time through, I discovered the power of the words in a completely different way! Reading through the second time caused me to check my "self talk" and mindset related to the kind of energy I am sending out into the world around me. I have re-discovered that Life CAN Be Good if I know The Secret! Now in my third time through, I am getting a firmer handle on where I tend to sabotage myself from time to time. As a result, I am fine tuning my life’s "want list!"
Bottom line? Let me encourage you to complete the following exercise:
- Since Life CAN Be Good, spend some time dreaming about, thinking about what that "good life" would be for you! What would it taste like; feel like; smell like; look like? Where would it take place? Who would be there with you? What kinds of things would you do? What kinds of accomplishments would be yours? What legacies would you leave behind? The first step to any good life is a clear picture of what it would be!
- As you form a clear picture of what your good life would be, begin writing it down. You may discover that many rough drafts will emerge in the process. Changes, alterations and fine tuning are likely! There is something powerful about putting our dreams on paper. That action alone tends to breathe life into our dreams! Perhaps you could find a small notebook dedicated solely to your dreams. Make that notebook your Life CAN Be Good workbook.
- Finally, I encourage you to read your dreams every day. Reading your dreams every day will tend to shift your thinking away from the tyranny of what you don’t have in life to what you want to have in life. It sets the stage for the next part of the process of creating a good life which will be addressed in the next essay.
Life CAN Be Good! This fact is the first step toward Possibility Living! Panic not! Despair not! Fear not! Simply "CAN IT" in these meantimes. What an adventure!
Peace!
Mark
Copyright 2008 Mark E. Hundley
Only In America written by Kix Brooks, Don Cook and Ronnie Dunn. Recorded on the cd Steers & Stripes, BMG Arista Nashville 2001.
