Yoda Rides Again!
I know — this sounds suspiciously "Yoda-ish," doesn't it? Well if the title hooked you in to reading this post, then it has accomplished its purpose!
Yoda's signature style of communication often causes us to pause and retrace his words to make sure we clearly understand the purpose of the message. To me, this communication style tends to place primary emphasis on the truly important picture he wishes to paint — the picture he believes will empower the listener for the tasks ahead. In other words, he states the most important thing first!
Let's take a look at just couple of examples: First — "Do or Do Not! There is no Try!" When Yoda spoke those words, the obvious message was either Act or Don't Act! There were no other choices! He knew that often when we spend time ruminating over options — thinking but never acting — we drain ourselves of precious resources necessary to make definitive decisions. We run the risk of becoming "mere shadows" of our true potential and possibility.
The second example of Yoda's unique style of communication comes when he says, "Proud of You, I am!" Once again, Yoda speaks true to form when he focuses on the sentiment he wishes to emphasize for the recipient, making his position in the equation the lesser of the two. I don't know about you, but if someone approached me and said, "Mark, Proud of You, I am" I would likely immediately begin to wonder what in the world I had done to garner such praise! Sometimes I think we may actually miss the real meaning in a message simply due to the emphasis placed on it parts. Now, the likelihood of us all beginning to speak "Yodaese" is slim at best, but perhaps we can learn to better decipher messages meant to encourage living more successfully on this planet if we focus attention on the more important parts of the messages we receive.
In keeping with my good friend Yoda's example allow me to now declare:
"An Island We Are Not!"
We find ourselves living in perhaps one of the most curiously challenging set of "mean times" in history! Never before has the combination of factors that affect living meaningfully on this planet been so all encompassing — so widespread in scope and nature! Never before have we been more aware of the relative smallness of our world! Our interconnectedness to all aspects of life on earth fly in our collective faces every day we awaken. The intertwining of our fates demands that we pay attention.
Throughout the four decades I have been privileged to work with people, I have observed that often when faced with challenges in life — whether as a result of some decision of our own or those of another — we tend to retreat into self, withdraw from the world around us and sink into a sort of isolation. Now this is not to say that we ALL react this way, but numbers significant enough do so that the negative effects possess the potential to grow exponentially. We often allow ourselves to be driven further into isolation by our embarrassment or fear or faulty assumptions. When we need support the most, we tend to shut it out.
Verification From Another Era
John Donne's poem "No Man Is An Island" says it this way:
"No man is an island, entire of itself
everyman is a piece of the continent, a part of the main
if a clod be washed away by the sea,
Europe is the less, as well as if a promontory were,
as well as if a manor of thy friends or of thine own were
any man's death diminishes me, because I am involved in mankind
and therefore never send to know for whom the bell tolls
it tolls for thee."
He understood the meaning of interconnectedness at levels we are truly only now bginning to understand! You see, when any member or our world is hurt, in a sense we are ALL hurt. When any member or our world is distressed, in a sense we are ALL distressed. When any member of our world faces danger, in a sense we ALL face danger. When any member of our world dies, in a sense a small parat within ALL of us dies as well. He understood that we need each other in order to journey successfully through this life. He understood that "An Island We Are Not!"
The Second Support System
The bottom line of living successfully in this world is that we operate best when we do so from the platform of interdependence! Possibility Living finds its relevancy as we embrace the realities that Life CAN Be Good and that People DO Create Good Lives! We have already discussed the necessity of filtering our life dreams, goals and action plans through our Personal Belief or Value System. The second support system that must be activated is that found in the power of the Resources Around Us!
Instead of closing in on self in the face of daunting life challenges, we must learn to reach out to those around us — to risk vulnerability in order to access the resources we need to successfully negotiate life's "mean times" and therefore live successfully in the "meantimes" of transition and change! This may be one of the most difficult lessons to learn. Many of us are taught that the ultimate goal to which we must strive is that of "living independently" and certainly independence ranks very highly; however, one level of living ranks above that one. That level is "Living Interdependently" for "An Island We Are Not!"
Living interdependently requires that we discover, develop and access the resources around us in times of struggle. One extremely important exercise I conduct with clients requires them to take stock of their existing support systems — resources they are able to access easily and readily in the event of the arrival of a "mean time" in their lives.
The first part of the exercise requires the client to list all existing support resources — names, numbers, addresses, etc — that make up their existing support system. You would likely find yourself amazed at how small those resource lists actually are when the initial part of the exercise is complete.
The second part of this exercise entails researching and compiling a list of names, phone numbers, addresses, email addresses, web sites, etc. that constitute the makings of an accessible list of resources for access in case of need. This part of the exercise focuses on expanding the potential resources of support.
The third part of the exercise finds the client actually going through the process of contacting some of those resources personally, depending on the nature of the resource, in order to finalize the assurance that they have the correct person, company or guide in place.
What about you? What kind of list could you create based on the exercise listed above? Who is your attorney? Your personal physician? Do you know a good counselor or therapist? Who is your insurance agent? Your banker? Your dry cleaners? Your child's teacher? Get the picture? Information is power! In order for us to fulfill our life goals/dreams and successfully work our action plans, we must be able to access support from the Resources Around US! Perhaps now woud be a good time to evaluate your support resources and expand them if necessary!
Remember as Yoda might say, "An Island We Are Not!"
Until next time . . . Peace!
Mark
Copyright 2008 Mark E. Hundley
