Several years ago, I read a powerful book written by Jack Canfield and Mark Victor Hanson – those brilliant men of Chicken Soup for the Soul fame. The title of the book is The Aladdin Factor. The premise of the book focuses on the power of the question. Jack and Mark teach readers to ask questions of others and self in order to live a more powerful and fulfilling life. I routinely pick that book up and fan the pages as a “refresher course” on the power of the question. About the same time I discovered this particular book, a friend of mine share a life-altering statement. He said, “Mark, statements simply tell. Questions sell!” I’ll always remember how I felt when he told me that. It was if a small earthquake erupted in my soul! Questions sell ideas much better than statements! As a result of those two experiences, I began working on formulating great questions to ask myself and others with whom I work.
One of tasks of a therapist is to ask really good questions and then listen intently to the answers that come as a result. As much as I work to ask good questions of others, I work to ask myself equally good questions. I would like to share with you ten questions I routinely ask myself. I am hopeful that you will find them as useful as I do.
- What do you want (to do, be, have, accomplish, leave behind, communicate)?
- What do you hope will happen if . . . ?
- What were you thinking when . . . ?
- How did you feel when . . . ?
- What kinds of reactions might you face if/when you . . . ?
- What parts of your plan worked and what parts need improvement?
- Where do you see yourself going with that idea?
- What is keeping you from following through right now?
- What ONE thing are you willing to commit to doing every day for the next 30 days to address this issue?
- What is it you are pretending to not know (about yourself, someone else, the situation, the challenge before you, etc)?
There! I’ve shared with you ten questions I routinely ask myself as I work to live as meaningful a life as possible. Did you see one or two questions that might cause you to look at your situation or life differently? Did you find a question that, if asked regularly, might cause you to step out of your comfort zone to address a problem?
My challenge to you is this: Begin asking more questions of yourself and others when you are tempted to make statements that simply tell. I have discovered that my friend’s advice has real merit . . . Questions really do sell!
Peace!
Mark E. Hundley
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