The theme of this post might seem obvious; however, many times it is not. We all have friends. Friends help the world go round. Friends love us unconditionally. Friends speak honestly to us. Friends listen patiently. Friends believe in us. Friends encourage us. Friends hold our hands. Friends enfold us in healing hugs. Friends . . . well, without friends, life would be quite miserable.
These are obvious statements about friends. The theme of this post is that friends are friends . . . period – except when they are not!
Sometimes friends become something other than all the things I listed above. Sometimes friends turn on us. Sometimes friends turn away from us. Sometimes friends turn into anything but friends. Sometimes they become mean, hateful, spiteful, dismissive, destructive and monstrous. Sometimes, friends give in to the darker side of their humanity and when this happens, we are the ones left wondering, hurting, confused, abandoned.
Now before you go writing this post off as overly negative, I have a silver lining building behind this dark cloud.
I have discovered that when these “friends” show themselves to be “the fair weather” type, other people from our past or present come to the surface to take their place. These are people who possess qualities that border on the divine. These are people who have always admired us, looked up to us, held us in high esteem – yet from afar. Sometimes these people have waited in the wings to become part of our supporting cast. Sometimes, the circumstances were just not right for the commonalities between us take seed and bloom.
Every now and then, when we need someone to love us unconditionally, support us without wavering or encourage us when others won’t we, are blessed by the grace bestowed upon us by these “angels unaware.”
The cool thing about this type of “friend wink” is that as often as I am open to receiving this type of grace, I am also waiting in the wings to be that grace for another “friend in need.” More often than not, these “friend winks” occur in brief encounters filled with intense feelings of connection that provide just what is needed in the moment.
When was the last time you experienced one of these “friend winks?” How cool was it? If you happen to read this and want to share one of those experiences with me, I welcome you!
Peace!
Mark E. Hundley
