This is the second post related to the wonderful children’s book, The Velveteen Rabbit by Marjorie Williams. I am examining various parts of a conversation between The Skin Horse and The Velveteen Rabbit concerning what it means to be “Real!”
One poignant question the Rabbit asked about being Real is, “Does it hurt?” The answer from the Skin Horse might seem a little shocking or even disheartening because he begins his answer with “Sometimes . . .” At least he was honest! At least he chose to avoid hiding the truth! At least he cared enough . . . to be Real. The rest of his answer goes like this: “When you are Real, you don’t mind being hurt.”
Wow! Seriously? You don’t mind being hurt? Isn’t there a name for folks who like pain?
Let’s be honest, the Skin Horse did not mean that one must love or crave pain in order to be Real – that would be illogical and unreasonable. What he DID say was that “When you are Real, you don’t mind being hurt.”
When a person realizes the power of being Real, he/she also realizes that being Real sometimes invites pain. Sometimes it hurts. What hurts about being Real?
Well, Real can hurt when:
- We are honest
- We love
- We are vulnerable
- We are generous
- We believe in others
- We encourage others
- We listen carefully
- We stand for the rights of others
- We take care of ourselves
- We tell the truth
- We forgive
- We dream
- We follow those dreams
You see, every life endeavor worth pursuing carries the risk of being hurt. People who understand being Real get this. They may not like it, but they get it and . . . they don’t mind.
People who experience difficulty being Real find ways to avoid the periodic pain associated with vulnerability, honesty, generosity, service, forgiveness, love and mindful self-care. The don’t get it. They wear their hearts and feelings on their sleeves and then walk through life swinging their arms around and getting their feelings hurt. And what is worse . . . the complain bitterly about the outcome that they create.
Let’s be honest, sometimes being Real hurts but When You Are Real, You Don’t Mind Being Hurt!
Peace!
Mark E. Hundley
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