Many, many years ago (yes, I’m that old…) I heard a presentation that changed my life completely! The title of the presentation was “Living in the Meantimes.” The entire presentation focused on defining Meantimes in two ways and three ways to get through them. I want to offer a thumbnail sketch of the invaluable lessons I learned way back when.
Meantimes are defined in two ways:
- Mean Times are events that come from out of the blue to knock us off center. They are more often than not, unexpected. Events such as sudden deaths, job losses, car accidents, traumatic natural disasters, major health changes and the like fit this definition. The first point of this presentation was to highlight the necessity of learning to deal with difficult events in proactive says.
- Meantimes are also defined as the time between time. In other words, the time between the event and the establishment of a “new normal.” Truly living through the necessary transitions that come as a result of a significant life changing event is the meaning of this side of Meantimes.
There you have it! We have to learn to live with both the life-altering event and the necessary transitions that follow.
How do we do this? Well, we do it through the activity of Reach! What does this mean? Follow along with me here:
- We must learn to REACH Up! This particular Reach refers to Reaching up and into our personal beliefs, values and Faith to access perspective and strength that lifts us above the obvious, the mundane and the chaos that often comes when Mean Times invade our lives. We must learn to Reach Up and access the things that empower us to find and create personal meaning in the midst of what appears meaningless.
- We must learn to REACH Out! We are social creatures! We need each other! We cannot live this life alone! We must learn to access the support that comes when we reach out to people and resources that provide practical guidance, direction, encouragement and affirmation. This support takes the form of people and books, and workshops and various professionals and art and music and . . . you get the picture. Reaching out empowers us to become part of the larger whole. We become part of the Village.
- We must learn to REACH In! In the end, no matter our Faith, beliefs or values; no matter the amount and type of support we receive from others, the truth is that WE must learn to depend on our own personal strengths and character. Another word for this Reach is Resiliency. We must identify, access and develop our personal resiliency. We must live our lives ourselves. No one can live our lives for us. As much as we have Faith and know how to engage others for support, the reality is that WE are the ones who must live the life before us.
There you have it, when in trouble we must learn to Reach UP, Reach Out and Reach In!
Peace!
Mark E. Hundley
