Darkness affects all of us – sometimes for the better and other times for the worse! The natural flow of nighttime darkness invites us to engage in restful, restorative sleep. The unnatural, oft times chaotic flow of darkness hatched in the spirit ensnares us in battles to salvage sanity and sometimes, life itself. None of us are immune to the experiences presented by both types. In the natural flow, the promise of sunrise is a given. The unnatural flow eclipses the promise of sunrise.
The seeds of darkness that invade our spirits spring from numerous sources – not all of which are obviously evil! Perhaps we might find the battle easier if the seed sources were blatantly despicable; however, I have found the opposite to be true. In King Lear, Shakespeare says, “The Prince of Darkness is a gentleman,” and who responds negatively to gentlemanly behaviors and invitations? Certainly not many. Now there are indeed sources of the destructive type of darkness that emanate from obviously evil, insidious, purposefully destructive places. Those are the ones that tend to take our time and attention! Those are the ones to which we point when we declare victory over evil! However, if one is brutally honest, these surface victories serve to cover the nagging, gnawing, gut-wrenching personal darkness that too often infests and infects our souls – the kind of darkness that repeats itself over and again in our thoughts, beliefs, actions, perceptions and directions. It is the kind of darkness that seeks to extinguish all light!
We all struggle with that hideous darkness . . . all of us! I know that I do. I have struggled with it my entire life to some degree. I often find myself in pits of despair – not deep pits, mind you but pits nonetheless. Sometimes these pits are merely divots in the road of life that appear much deeper and inescapable than they are. When I have found myself choosing to wallow in those pernicious puddles, a gentle nudging from a friend or a word of encouragement from colleague or an inspirational quote found in a book are enough to detach the sticky strands of darkness and move me forward. There are other times, however, when I find myself waist deep at the bottom of a well stuck in a bog of darkness so overwhelming, so suffocating that I see no hope of ever escaping. It is during those times when wrapped in the sinuous tentacles of despair that the light at the top of the well seems only a pinpoint. And yet . . . light has always existed, if only that of a distant star in the ebony skies of a moonless midnight.
Perhaps the most disconcerting aspect of this battle with darkness lies in the fact that two of the sources from which this darkness finds its genesis are family of origin and religion. I will write more about those in later posts (please note the “Part 1” in the title of this offering). Suffice to say that the Prince of Darkness holds a prominent place in both institutions . . .
What can be done when we find ourselves battling with those Dark Places? Perhaps a simple three step formula can help us begin to alter the landscape of our lives. Here is one that I have found effective – one that I turn to over and again.
- Reach Up – I don’t mean to whatever set of religious rig-a-marole tenets that could have played a part in trapping you in the darkness to begin with. I am talking about reaching up to something that is bigger, stronger, more powerful. I am talking about getting in touch with that which hovers over the chaos of life – those beliefs and values that transcend the obvious. Not all of these will be tied up in neat packages of religiosity.
- Reach Out – We are social creatures. We need one another and yet we must be careful to whom we reach out. I have less than a handful of people I trust with my heart and soul. When I give myself permission (which isn’t always the case – especially for a counselor-type) to become vulnerable, I often find compassion, comfort and honesty – all of which are necessary for healing.
- Reach In – Ultimately, I must become brutally honest with myself. I must examine my past in order to make sense of my present and set realistic paths for my future. Too often, I work to only stay in the moment, ignoring what has gotten me where I find myself. The Cherokee have a proverb that says, “Do not let yesterday take up too much of today.” Read that again . . . see what it says and does NOT say? It does not say to forget or minimize the past. It says to keep it from taking up TOO MUCH of today. We must examine it in order to change and heal.
I am hopeful that you will find some hope and courage in reading this. I am hopeful that you will walk with me as I share how we move into and out of our darkness.
Peace!
P.S. I invite you to visit my website and consider downloading my short story entitled DarkLight for a fictional journey into and through darkness.
